M. Hughes Casa Retreat

Located in the beautiful San Diego area, is the home of a dear friend of mine, Mickele, whose name is pronounced Michael, not Mickallee, even though she is, in fact, a female. She invited me to her home for the weekend where we drank lemon tea with honey, watched movies with her cat who has so many names it’s hard to pick just one, but for the sake of this post I’ll call her Peanut Butter, which isn’t one of her names but I think it suits her. We had pedicures and ate dinner out at the Yellow Coyote Tortilla Factory and went to the bookstore where I proceeded to spend an exorbitant amount of money on books like ‘How to Live with Intention’ and ‘Don’t Be Such an Idiot.’ (I may have made up that last title.) We talked. And talked. And also, we talked. And it was the absolute wonderfullest weekend I could ever have had right now. Mike has a way of being supportive yet neutral. She listens to me go on and on about the same dang thing for hours and still nods her head like she’s listening. Because she is! And caring! And she loves me and also Joe. She knows us both very well and so when I tell her that I have no idea how to move forward, she just nods and holds my hand until I figure out how to do it. Because I can do. I just forget.

I don’t know much. But I know a little. I know I have to do the hard thing first. Doing the hard thing. sigh Yes, well, it’s hard. Otherwise it would be called the easy thing. Or the thing least likely to offend or require effort. Or the comfy thing. Hey. I want the comfy thing. However, the hard thing is most likely to have the biggest payoff. It’s the thing that means the most later and the thing you keep thanking yourself for choosing to do and God for helping you do. Doing the hard thing requires concentration and remembering and continued effort. It’s always looking for what is hiding so that you don’t miss it when you fall into old patterns. We actually do have to live with intention. Or we don’t. And our lives just kind of happen to us. And usually not in the way we hoped or wished. And the people we live with and call family deserve to have us trying to be our best. They deserve a life with someone living their authentic life and not someone just sludging through the day. They deserve attention! and support! and love! and a continued effort! to come together and teamize. But there is simply no way to do that TEAM thing until you have a good start on the ME thing. That I know.

So here is to change. And living authentically. And continuing even though it’s hard. I’m cautiously optimistic.

And now for photos!!

Here is our dinner table:

Here is Mike at Pannikin in front of the giant portrait of Marilyn Monroe:

And here she is trying to bite the entire universe she was so hungry:

Good thing her breakfast of scrambled eggs that they steam cook using the esspresso machine came:

And here she is demonstrating great empathy:

This wildly swinging heart hangs from her rearview mirror:

And here is a pillow that shows how OCD I can really be. It has nothing to do with anything else in this entry, but I thought you’d like to see it.