Category: photos

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So Much Less Than It Should Be

I’m not sure where the weekend, Monday or today went, but suddenly it’s 5pm on Tuesday. I’ve been doing stuff. New projects (would you expect anything less) job interviews, new writing gigs etc. I hate doing the flirt, dash and run update but I’m afraid that’s all I have in me at the moment.

Look, it’s my daughter:

al3b

Umm, look! It’s Ants on a Log:

one of joe's favorite snacks

Look! It’s my genetic eyebrow showing up in my son:

the eyebrow he gets from me

Do you feel cheated? Do you still love me? Are you still coming over this weekend with a 6pack of Red Stripe?

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Moving On

Thanks so much for all your thoughtful feedback on my last post. I’m very lucky to have such awesome people reading my blog. I’ve decided to write a letter to the CEO of the company to let them know what happened and then I plan to let it go. I don’t want to spend too much more time worrying about the negativity of that situation. I need all the room I can create for the positive, if you know what I mean.

That brings us to the assorted linkage of today’s program:

-Tomorrow we’re going to take the kids to the Promenade in Santa Monica and Alex and I are sneaking over to meet up with Thomas Hawk, Trevor Carpenter and some others for a Photowalk. The details can be found here at Upcoming.

–This is a very accurate and compelling story written by a woman raised in polygamy and struggling to get out.

–Cindy Samuels mentioned in an email the other day that my writing could be compared to Anne Lamott. Of course I then had to go reacquaint myself with her writing and found this gem. I think Lamott is fabulous and I had forgotten how much I identified with her truth. And it appears that where I’m getting to with religion might line up with her also. To think I might someday be as real and solid in my writing as her, well, it’s an honor just to be nominated.

-How many times do I have to ‘friend’ you before we are really and truly friends already? How many social networking sites have to spring up and be semi-successful before we begin using some kind universal ID system (maybe OpenID?) where I’m allowed to just suck in my already known and trusted ‘friends’ and stop having to go through the monotonous process or finding and friending you all again? Have Twitter, Facebook, Linkedin, Flickr, Involver, Upcoming and Pownce taught us nothing? And those are just the ones I use the most and the ones I can think of. There are many, many others. Make my life as end-user easier, already.

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I Was A Wrangler At Blogher '07

Last year at Blogher, I commented on a distinct oogy feeling that permeated parts of the conference. This year, despite however much I was quietly alert for it, The Oogy did not appear. Blogher ’07 was fabulous and there was not one moment that the feeling wasn’t just loving, creative and supportive for everyone.* I spoke with Elisa on Sunday morning right before I left for my flight and asked her what she thought the difference was. She mentioned better internet access, better support through the hotel and services, better hotel in general (I don’t think anyone there last year has forgotten those charming rooms – yuck.), and a smaller jump in growth as opposed to last year when the growth rate was about double. I don’t think I had put all those components together, but I agreed with her instantly after she listed them. Congrats to Elisa, Lisa and Jory – the Co-founders of Blogher.

I got to meet Ree and have dinner with her the first night. I also met her mom and her daughters for a quick second. Wow, talk about adorable. Later, as Ree and I took a cab with Heather and Jessica to one of the cocktail parties, Ree looked mischievously at the cabbie and let out a burp like you have never smelled heard before. In fact, I think she might even win Heather and GEORGE! in one of their burping contests. It was THAT amazing. In the next cab on the way to the next cocktail party (I’m sure typing cock a lot today) Ree sang out one of her Ethel Merman specials (did you know she once did a Leahpeah Burp special just for lil’ol me?) and I swear that cabbie wanted to just dump us at the closest corner to get us out of the car. I think but I’m not sure because we were all laughing so hard. We demoed the new Wii game called Boogie at the Imperfect Parent Soiree. You can see what a great dancer Jessica is here.

BlogHer is like Disneyland (I don’t really like Disneyland, but you know what I mean, right?) for people like me that like to actually meet and interact with other virtual people. So many of the panels were wonderful and informative. I enjoyed meeting or re-meeting everyone there. Which brings us to my panel on Saturday, (did you enjoy that sweeping fast-forward through an entire day and a night and a morning?), The Art of Crafts. This panel would not have happened if Grace hadn’t suggested it to me. And if Natalie hadn’t asked Fred for Amy’s email. And Fred hadn’t decided he could trust me. And if certain unnamed people hadn’t vouched for me. And if Amy hadn’t said yes. Thanks, Universe.

The panel went great. I think I enjoyed it so much because of the great mix of women, all with their own strengths. Kristin Roach is fantastic. I wanted her for the panel so bad because she has this innate sense of sustainability in her work that is so important to me. As someone mentioned, waste is everywhere and it’s heartbreaking to see all the waste we generated at the conference when Chicago doesn’t even have a recycling program to help minimize the impact. Kristin reuses some of her grandma’s craft bits and reclaimed items from the thrift shop to make new items and it’s just inspiring. She hand-dyes yarn and sells kits to support her other projects so if you are in to that kind of thing, check it out. It’s beautiful, yummy stuff.

Natalie Zee Drieu was wonderful on the panel. She has this great over-arching perspective on the crafting community because of her position with Craft. She’s privy to the cool peeps and the hot links. (now I sound like a rapper.) She started an entry here at the Craftzine blog for anyone wanting to continue the conversation or people looking for great links or wanting to link to their own crafts. It was a little tricky for me to find the free registration, so in case you have any issues, sign up here to create a free account so you can comment. Nat has a huge Flickr set here, some images which have a story I’m sure I don’t remember. Thanks, free Oops! wine and Helenjane!

It was a real pleasure to talk with Natalie. She invited me to come along to have cocktails (see? again!) with herself, Kristen and Chloe Dao, winner of Project Runway Season 2. Chloe and Natalie were talking high fashion during which I got lost a few times because high fashion? I think I don’t own any. (although Kristin made her awesome dress, which I think is pretty high fashion.) But I still loved listening and learning new things. Chloe was very sweet and told me the behind secrets including things about my beloved Tim Gunn. I still do the best impression of him you’ve ever seen. Seriously.

Kathy Cano Murillo was adorable. I had no idea I would like her so much because due to an unfortunate hot knife accident, she missed our conference call a few weeks ago. So, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I guess if I had to summarize her, I’d say she’s Glitterific. She’s one busy lady, what with her new product line with Duncan, her writing and crafting and her TV appearances. I’m so glad she found the time to come. (side note, I found out she’s friends with Laurie Notaro. Hi, Laurie!) Kathy’s heart is as pure as gold and she deserves all the success she’s reaping.

And then there is Amy. Amy Sedaris. I don’t even know what to tell you guys about her. I knew she would be funny as hell because I think she can’t help it. She has too much organic Jerry Blank in her blood not to be completely inappropriate and hysterical. But, I really didn’t know before hand just how smart, charming, kind, warm and authentic she is. At one point at the cocktail (16 times now, is it?) party, as the 8th person asked her to call a loved one and say something insane to their cousin Bill, I marveled at her ability to just keep being amenable and gracious. I asked her at dinner how she keeps her composure and if it wears on her and she said, quite genuinely, that it’s fine and she enjoys it. She said her fans are nice, not usually scary, and that she appreciates them appreciating her. She said it so much better than I just did, but you get the point. And smart. She knows what she wants and figures out how to make it happen. I guess you have to be super smart to get where she is and I should have figured, but something about her disarming public persona makes it hard to see sometimes. And authentic. She really and truly loves crafting and crafters and wants to support them. Yes, some of her crafts are on the silly side and she does some fun re-packaging of other products and puts her label on them, but she puts her love in to each and every thing she does, silly or not. I’m so happy to have met her. I can honestly say I enjoyed every second with her and that is kind of a rarity. Even as we were straight-faced lying as we waited for the shuttle to some really nice gentleman about how we grew up together in a small town cul-de-sac and how we’d been best friends forever and even when she dumped about a gallon of perfume on halfway through the book signing and blamed it on me and even when she yelled out CHING-CHONG to a Japanese lady and even when she made me take $40 for helping to sell all her awesome crap at the table – it was great. When I took this photo, (one of only about 6 I took the entire conference), Amy had just finished making a Bean Burrito (which she describes making in the podcast linked below and which she gave me as a gift when we left.) and she took the extra hose piece and slipped it on her hand. For the next few minutes she was just talking and gesturing with her hand to people as they came to the table as if it wasn’t even there and it was SO funny. She turned to me and said, ‘About that web stuff!’

The very nice Jennifer of Craftsanity made a podcast of our panel. You can listen here. And thanks to Suebob for being our great mic runner. Man, I was so glad to see her when I walked in the room. I knew I wouldn’t have to stress or do a lot of making sure she knew what I wanted before hand. It’s like she can read my mind.

There is lots more. I have no idea if I’ll write about it or not. I might be bloghered out. But thanks to everyone who came up and said hi to me. Leave a comment and say hi again so I’ll have your URLs. It might be days before I unpack and find all the business cards.

ps. links mentioned in the podcast:
– my craft trading site at craft.leahpeah.com
– Andrea’s jewelry from Superherodesigns.com
– craftzine
– creative commons

pps – the latest issue of Craft, Issue 4 shown here at the top, has my candle making article in it.

*Updated to add – I guess I missed the oogy and I misspoke. I should have said “there was not one moment that the feeling wasn’t just loving, creative and supportive for me.”

Updated again to add – Ariel from Electrolicious liveblogged our panel.

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Family At The 50th

It can be rough hanging out with family. I get excited and nervous. I look forward to it and dread it at the same time. I’m sure I’m not alone in having mixed feelings. Everyone’s childhood was a mixed bag and along with the happy memories, there are usually things you’d just as soon forget entirely.

While I anticipate getting to reconnect with my siblings, the mere fact that there are 7 of them makes it hard to fit it all in. And you sometimes end up with these little rushed Howareyous, I’mdoingfinethanks and Whatareyoudoingnow-s that can start to feel a little less than genuine by the 4th or 5th time. Add to that the fact that not many of them understand the whole internet-blogging-writing thing and it strains the conversation a bit. Or brings it to a startling halt. Whichever.

The 10 Of Us

I love them all to pieces but I find that I don’t have a lot in common with many of them. We can talk about parenting to a certain point but then it starts to break apart since I’m part of a divorced/remarried couple and the only one of my kind among My People. I don’t have the luxury of feeling free enough to complain about the strains of parenthood since part of me feels like if I dare to utter anything along those lines, I’ll jinx the time I get to spend with my kids. Like, I should be so grateful that I have them as much as I do, complaining about anything would show a distinct lack of gratitude. So when another parent starts to roll their eyes a bit and vent about so-and-so at a certain age, I try to identify with it but really, in my head I’m thinking about how lucky I am if I get to see that particular personality trait at that certain age or I’m thinking about how sad I am that I missed that when it was happening with my child.

And of course, religion. Some of my family feels like I must still be mentally ill because if I was really well, I’d have rejoined the Mormon church. They can’t fathom not wanting to be Mormon. This subject goes so deep that it’s sometimes hard to figure out where the emotional part ends and the factual part starts. I don’t believe I’ll ever join any organized religion, least of all the Mormon church, but that doesn’t mean I can’t understand why they want to belong to it.

Politics are most definitely out.

Which really leaves nutrition and diet. You might say my family has a slight obsession with talking about those subjects. Fiber, sleeping habits, blood results and breakfast. Oh yes, we know how to have a good time. At some point, one of us should write it all down and sell the book.

There is one part of every family get together that I truly do look forward to and that is the singing get-together. We have a folder thick with old sheet music and almost everyone knows the words or at least the tune and can hum along. They are the songs we sang on long car rides from our home to my grandparent’s home every summer. I have the best memories of my father’s voice singing tenor and my older brother singing bass, my mom and sisters singing soprano and alto and me trying to figure out where my voice fit. The Green Eyed Dragon is one of my favorites as is I’m Gonna Sit Right Down and its counter harmony It’s A Sin To Tell A Lie. Singing with my family always makes me teary and emotional. Sometimes I’ll just have tears streaming down my face and no way to control it. I’m not sad, exactly, but nostalgic, maybe, for what I wish my childhood could have been like and thankful for this small way to connect with all of them. It’s hard to always feel slightly on the outside.

This year for the family talent show, Alex sang Fever and the boys and I sang backup. We had a good time and no one in my family had a heart attack from the explicit meaning of the song. Here we are in all our glory:

Fever

We ended the evening with a dance. We try a dance every few years and my boys never fail to suddenly disappear. This year, my mom was the MC and she did a great job switching things up. We did the Broom Dance, a Two-Step Cakewalk and the Virginia Reel with her calling out the steps.

Virginia Reel 1

Even with all our issues, I wouldn’t trade my family for any other. Especially now since they said we’ll never go camping again. I’m voting 5 star hotel with masseuse and basement arcade complete with soundproof walls.

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Photabulous, The Recap

sd33

I threw clam chowder up once and I couldn’t eat it for about 6 years and that was a onetime vomit deal. Nothing like the incredible amounts of awesome pain I’ve been in with our old friend Blue Cheese. You’d think I got ran over by a truck and then wrung out like an old dishrag. Picture me lying prone, moisture-less and wrinkled up like an old prune, arm extended slightly up and meekly calling for water. Additionally, I’ve had about 10 narcoleptic naps the past few days and as Joe will tell you, normally I can’t fall asleep anywhere except in the bed with about 15 pillows moated around me, the lights out and the fan on low to lull me into unconsciousness. Sometimes there is chanting going on in the background and incense rolling out in tufts over the headboard. If he so much as breaths wrong, I stiffen and have to start the whole relaxation process* over again, starting with my toes. Man, I’m a party in the sack.

The first and only time I ate blue cheese prior to this past weekend was in high school. Someone dared me to taste it so I tongued a chunk, gagged, and then spent my hard-earned 5 dollars on a new Duran Duran cassette tape. I probably had an eating disorder and I threw up on purpose so I could fit into my super tight button fly stonewashed 501s, so I don’t think you can count it as a really sad episode in my life. Plus, Double Duran? I scored. (Simon! I waited for you for so long!)

Joe will routinely get salad with blue cheese. I still kiss him but I have to admit that it’s not high on my list of Things Joe Eats That Make Me Lust. It’s higher than onion and garlic but lower, much lower, than say, strawberries or chocolate.

Last weekend I took Alex to San Diego with me for a get together with the photabulous women I shoot photos with occasionally. (I can say occasionally now that it’s happened twice, right?) Anyhoo, we started the wonderful day eating brunch and then walking downtown looking for things to take photos of. We only annoyed a couple of people. Quite a successful feat for us. I must say that what Ocean Beach was lacking in silicone it more than made up for in body odor. BO in OB. GET IT?? And also? Unfortunate clothing choices.

While we waited for our food at Hodad’s, I heard my name called through the open window. And lo and behold, there was Joe’s Aunt Joan! Fun surprise. We chatted through the window until the angry man (ASShole!) sitting in between us “asked” us to stop.

At the beach we saw a dude with friendly parrots who used a very unique call to get them to come back. I believe it went something like, “Hey! Get back here!! NOW!!” And the weird thing is that they did.

Margot, Susan, Alex and I went to Old Town to the Living Room to eat fish tacos for dinner. And then Margot went home. (sadface)(hello, matt!)

On the way to Susan’s home, we stopped at Aaryn’s home. The minute I walked into the door her husband Sam put me to work folding towels. Just kidding. I love to fold clothes so I pushed my way into the Folding Circle. I just don’t like putting them away or hanging them up. Their home is quite lovely and we had great conversation but we missed seeing Ruby in the flesh. What? Kids don’t stay up past 11?

We finally made it to Susan’s where we found hand written notes scattered along the kitchen counter intermixed with plates and bowls of food. Twas a veritable smörgasbord and all fixed lovingly by Mr. Susan, Doug Myrland. Yes, Doug had given up on us ever really making it to the house and had long since gone to bed, but he left behind him the very best parts of himself and we consumed the delectable chicken wings and veggies and fried zucchini and fried olives. (Olives? Really?? Yes. They were yummy.) And herein is where we meet our old friend Blue Cheese because what would you dip all the wonderful crudités in if not blue cheese dressing? And it wasn’t just an ordinary blue cheese dressing. This was a Doug Myrlandized blue cheese dressing with additions that I can only imagine. Probably magic and fairy dust because it was the most delicious thing I’d ever had on raw carrots and celery sticks.

About a half gallon later, I went straight to bed where my stomach proceeded to not digest a single, solitary iota of any particle of food. One of the fun effects of stupid hypothyroid is slow digestion, which makes me never really feel hungry and I forget to eat because the food just sits there. It also means I’m pooping out chicken and blue cheese today from 3 days ago even though I emptied my stomach through the top vent by throwing up the entire drive home. Yes, I loved the blue cheese the first time but not the next 17 times. But, Doug! Thanks for being so sweet and next time we’ll get there sooner and eat with you. But I’m afraid I must bid the blue cheese adieu.**

I saw my old/new doc the other day and she upped my dose by about a kazzillion percent, was astonished at the lack of care I’d received during the year and a half I had been away from her and was righteously angry on my behalf as I told her all about how ridiculous and obtuse that dumb doctor was. I felt validated and safe. And then I cried real puppy dog tears and thanked her from the bottom of my heart for being so informed and saying all the things I needed to hear. After feeling my throat for what seemed like ages, she determined that the nodules are actually getting smaller. Instead of going crazy with some kind of invasive procedure, we’re going to wait and see. I like that. She even hugged me on the way out and gave me a two-month supply of Synthroid at the new, higher dose to save me money. You can’t beat that. As bad as the old place was, the new/old place is that great in contrast and I’m so glad to be back with them. There is a reason they don’t accept HMOs. It allows them to keep their level of care so much higher.

*My relaxation technique was given to me by one of my therapists where you start with either your head or your toes and consciously think about each body part relaxing while steadying and deepening your breathing. It usually works for me but it takes a dang long time.

**Alex just came home and told me that her stomach feels terrible and that she might start ralphing. I wonder if we caught a bug and that it had nothing to do with blue cheese at all? If that is the case, I’d like to apologize to Doug’s Blue Cheese Dip. Aaryn, did you say you got sick, too?

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Wherein Katie Plans Her Uganda Trip (and sends me a surprise!)

I have this friend Katie. Katie sent me a present in the mail a few weeks ago. I guess she thought I would like it or something.

katie_spiro2

It just so happens that Katie is planning a second trip to Uganda. When I went to the fabulous PD weekend, she told me all about what she was trying to accomplish. And far from being the normal, ‘but it’s for the children! The CHILDREN!!‘, she had a very well planned out idea of how things were going to work. Being that this is her second trip, I have no fear that she knows what she’s getting into. Also, the fact that she had to figure out how to send herself shows how committed she is. But, I really felt like she could use some help getting all the components together to make her idea come to life.

I sent an email out to some friends to see what reaction they might have. So far, it’s been resoundingly positive. Heather donated $100, an anonymous donor matched that $100, KristyK sent some really great supplies that she had her kids help decorate (so great!):

UGANDA_kristyk

And the other day, Tracey called and told me she had lined up a point-n-shoot camera with direct portable printer to be donated to Katie from HP. Such great news!

Here is an excerpt from an email from Katie earlier today:

I had a meeting with the people I’ll be going to Uganda with on Sunday and a group of four of us are in the planning stages for how this will look when we’re there. So now it looks like this will be my main focus while in the country and there are SO many good ideas being tossed around. I can’t wait to see how this will all unfold: 1) being able to tell the story of what’s going over there when we get back, and 2) giving people the chance to express themselves and see a picture (no pun intended) of hope as they realize dreams for the future.

I was talking to one of the counselors who is working there and she said the great thing about this idea is that people don’t often do that where we’ll be going. With what they’ve lived through, seeing so much death, and living in such extreme poverty, they only see what’s right in front of them, not really giving thought to what the future could hold, or even what tomorrow could hold for that matter. So giving them the chance to dream and see the possibility of a better tomorrow and simply express themselves in a way they wouldn’t otherwise is extremely exciting for me.

Katie still needs more donations if you have $$ or Polaroid cameras etc. to donate. Let me know if you want more information. We have about 4 weeks left to get it all to her.

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The Flip Side

Dude. Where is the flip side, people? I could use some good news.

First of all, Schmutzie has long been one of my web favorites. When I was scouring the internet looking for people to interview, I found her and then hung on because wow, she’s original and compelling and real and funny. And a little wacky. And super smart. Put all together, you get the inimitable Schmutzie, whom I love with abandon that would probably scare the cat. I don’t want her to have cancer but just so you know, what I want means nothing. If it would help I might even consider becoming Mormon again. That is how much I love her.

Then you have Susan’s mom, Ginny, whom I never met in person but got to know so well through Susan’s Flickr. Susan showed the good, bad, ugly and the beautiful through her images and captions. Sometimes, all you could do was read and cry, which would turn into laughter at some point because Ginny was such a wild card. Taking care of an aging parent who has lost their ability to be a part of their own care-giving is an enormous drain and continuing learning experience for the people around them. But, besides all that, it’s also just what we do for those we love when the Universe presents us with that opportunity. I hope someday Susan writes a book about the experience. I’m sure many people would benefit and would love to read it. I got to meet Susan’s brother and sister and friend last weekend for lunch. It was right after Ginny had died and I wasn’t sure what to expect. The only way to summarize the experience is to quote my son as we walked out of Seaport Village – “I was worried it might be awkward, but mom, they were great. I hope when I get to be their age I’m fun and vibrant even when things about your life are hard.’

I got sick towards the end of Mother’s Day, barely sitting through dinner before beginning the puke-fest, and unfortunately couldn’t make it to Ginny’s Funeral Party on Monday in San Diego. From what I hear, it was really awesome.

That brings us to Suebob. I read her blog but don’t comment often. Pretty much what I do everywhere on the internet. Suebob’s sister had pneumonia and then just kept declining. Every day I’d go and hope to read how she might be getting better and pulling out of it. But that wasn’t what happened. Having a few sisters of my own, I can only imagine how awful it is to lose one, leaving behind children and a husband. I can’t think about it for too long.

And now for JPGMag. I LOVE JPG. Love. Love the idea of it. Love the creators of it. Loved working with them, editing for them, interviewing for them and even submitting photos, none of said photos were ever selected, but it didn’t matter. There was always next time. There was always the thought in the back of my mind that if I just kept shooting, learning, taking the opportunity to find interesting things to photograph, my photo might get selected next time. It wasn’t impossible because look at all the evidence! Other amateurs were getting their photos published every issue. The community was a living breathing thing and it was fun to be a part of it.

As a person that comes up with ideas myself, a cultivator, if you will, I’m always interested to get to know others of my species. The people that think it is a good idea to throw the next few years of their life into something because it makes them happy and probably not much money at first. The people that get excited about doing something right, even if it takes longer. The people that bring the people they know along with them because they like to feel like a family. That surround themselves with other passionate people because it feels good. That care about the end product or experience being solid and quality. That want to involve the community in new, interactive ways and explore how things can grow. These are my people.

All the time I was a part of any part of JPG magazine thus far, I have very much appreciated. I will no longer be submitting any images to JPG. I will no longer be interviewing or submitting stories. Because if it was such an easy thing to erase two of the core founders and their contributions, how can my little contributions have any chance of longevity at all? If I can’t trust that my submissions and contributions will be treated with respect, I don’t want to play anymore. To pretend that the first 6 issues of JPG don’t exist is to say that all the people in the community that participated had no value. What a shame. I kept my account open because I wanted my small voice to be heard there. Heather’s words. Derek’s words.

What I wrote over at the JPG site:

I almost deleted my account last Sunday when I got an email from Derek explaining what had happened. I’m still so shocked that someone’s labor of love can be ripped away from them in this way. Instead of deleting, however, I decided to publicly say how wrong I feel it is. I will no longer be contributing to JPG.

The roots of something should never be forgotten, changed, erased or buried. The end result, which is then basically a lie, will never be as strong, genuine or connected to.

End of story.

For Mother’s Day I got a new Feist CD, some beautiful picture frames, a balloon, a dinner out and a baby boy cockatiel, who currently has no name.

Happy Mother's Day 07

But mostly, I got to spend lots of time with the people that I love and that love me. At one point, after dinner on the drive home, I realized I wasn’t really feeling any of it. I wasn’t feeling. I could have cried if I’d only had the feelings to do so. Instead, I just looked out the window at the lights.

Update: And now Eden’s dad?? Are you kidding me, Universe? XO, Eden. Lots of them.