You Need To Hold My Hand (Or, Finally, Get A Tshirt)

Last week I went to Santa Barbara and had lunch with Eden. And why not, right? I mean, if you had the option of having lunch with Eden, you would, right? She’s funny and pretty and smells nice. She knows the best places to eat fish tacos. She wears cute shoes. Cookie licks her. In fact, if you don’t want to have lunch with Eden, I’d venture to say there is something wrong with you.

I wish I could say I JUST went there to have lunch with Eden, but in fact, I went because somewhere along the line I turned into a confused, tear-leaking mass that can’t find the right freeway exit or right turn after getting whittled away to nothing by a mean man. I turned into the lady that drives along in her car, weeping under her sunglasses and wiping snot on her sleeve because the box of tissues shot along the van floor and went behind the back seat when she made that last wrong turn. I’m the lady you feel sorry for when you glance over at the light and mistakenly think she’s singing along to music you can’t hear until you notice the quivering lower lip.

I’ve spent the better part of 2 months trying to find the right place to get Tshirts made with the Flawed But Authentic logo on them. I’ve talked to so many screen printers that I could catalog them at this point and tell you which ones made me cry and which ones just laughed in my face. Because I only want to make about 25 shirts. And that is unheard of, people. UNHEARD of. You don’t even start talking Tshirts unless you want 100 minimum order and it is beneath them to even talk to you. Or they will just charge you an arm and a leg per shirt. And who wants to spend $36 on a Tshirt? Not me. Not you, either.

So that brings us to the kind and great smelling Eden who took pity on me and drove me over to her personal screenprinter, Arosha, who did NOT laugh at me or make me cry and welcomed my tiny Tshirt order at a reasonable price. Yay for Arosha! And Yay! for Eden and thanks for holding my hand the entire time. Sorry about the palm sweat.

Please behold the selected choices.

You can have this extra long-bodied shirt by Kavio in a S, M, L or XL:

You can have this shirt by Hanes in a 1X, 2X or 3X:

They are both a basic black color and I have no idea why they look a little different.

And this is the logo:

And this is how we’re pretending that I’ve made one already and it looks like this:

See how great it accentuates the breasts?

How do you get one? Glad you asked. Click here for all sizes. I couldn’t get the sizes to work in the store so I’ll email you after I get your order to find out the size until I get that fixed. As soon as I have a minimum of 25 shirts, I’ll send the order in and then it takes about 2 weeks. Yay! for us!

26 Replies to “You Need To Hold My Hand (Or, Finally, Get A Tshirt)”

  1. @parslife — Leah tried cafepress and the quality was not good enough, the shirts were thin and faded immediately. Please stop suggesting cafepress. It’s not happening.

  2. Thanks for not using CafePress (I’m really not a fan of their clothing).

    When ordering, how does one specify the shirt size? Not sure if I’ve missed something, or if this is just an oversight.

    Also, the fba design is *awesome*!

  3. I want one. I think medium. Unless it’s a type of 100% cotton that shrinks. Then I need large.

    Love you, Lee

    A thought on afore-mentioned accentuation: Could “flawed but authentic” be seen as commentary about one’s breasts?

    🙂

  4. I really want a shirt but here’s my problem, I really don’t want to pay $15 shipping. I live in Puerto Rico and if using the USA postal service then the price is the same as shipping in the USA (we are a commonwealth) so am confused by the rate, but I do want a shirt, let me know if this is just the way it works and woe is me or is there another option? (btw I loved the breasts enhancement feature)

  5. i don’t think that last lady has any breasts? is that HOW they are “accentuated” b/c i could stand to reduce mine if only in pretend by wearing your fab shirt.

    for some reason, i had to read this 8 times before i could compute in my head that people WERE MEAN TO YOU! they suck and will eventually die mean and slow horrible deaths. so pooey on them.

  6. Hip Hip Hooray, it is a very grand day!

    I was not allowed to choose a size on the form. I would like a medium please (or Large if it is a cotton shrinky shirt)

    Dude…this…is…..awesome! And also….palm sweat = authentic!

  7. Leah,

    I am interested in the extra long shirt but was wondering how they fit. Are they the fitted kind or are they just regular type shirts?

    Thanks
    Jessica

  8. jessicab – here’s what the Kavio website says:

    “Our cut is more snug than most brands, so as to flatter you in all the right places. We recommend ’rounding up’ sizes if you’re at the border of measurements or you like a loose fit.”

  9. Hiya, I put my order in however I didn’t see where I could put in size. I’ll take a medium if it didn’t show up anywhere.

    XOXOXO Can’t wait!

  10. “I turned into the lady that drives along in her car, weeping under her sunglasses and wiping snot on her sleeve because the box of tissues shot along the van floor and went behind the back seat when she made that last wrong turn.”

    I love that lady! I am that lady!

    and yay for t-shirts… the design is awsome

  11. Too late but if you ever need anyone else to do shirts, my old friend Curt at Wear in the World in San Luis Obispo is great. I asked him what his minimum was and he said thoughtfully “One. I will absolutely not go below one shirt.”

  12. Gee, sorry that my attempts to help Leah seem to have offended you, Joe. I really would have expected something along the lines of, “Thanks for the suggestion. We tried them and didn’t like them” instead of the rude brush off.

    At the risk of more rude dismissal of my efforts, here is another service that allows you to choose the shirt:

    http://www.spreadshirt.com

    Hoping this is not as offensive to you.

  13. whoa @parslife! goodness gracious! I didn’t mean to be rude, you had mentioned cafepress before and then I replied to you that cafepress was a nonstarter, and why. Then you suggested it again. I felt like you were talking like a marketer and not taking part in a conversation. I should have linked to Leah’s statement about the bad cafepress shirts from September. She said:

    “Also, I’ve taken the t shirts down from Zazzle and Cafepress for a bit. I’ve been told they aren’t the best quality. I’m going to look into some other options and then bring them back. In the meantime, if you’ve bought one and are unsatisfied, email me and I’ll buy it back from you. Or, replace it for free when the new ones come out, up to you. Just let me know.”

    So cafepress is a bit of a sore subject around here. I’m sorry I was curt to you — that was not justified and I apologize for that– I was only trying to be clear about something that needs to be clear. I don’t want any of the other folks buying these latest shirts to think cafepress is even an option because of the bad experiences leahpeah’s readers have had with them. Leah is going with a more local printer with excellent quality printing, not an on-demand online service who is really not accountable to the client (leah). The convenience of these services is great, but the quality we’ve experienced is poor.

    Namaste,
    Joe

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